Conversation

Yesterday, within a professional conversation, I had shared that I was a widow. A little later, I heard “Im so sorry for your loss.” I was really touched by this, as it has been ten years, and it is not often that someone will now offer condolences. As I spoke, it became clear, that the person was referring to The Queen. (I’m Brtish in case you did not know.)

It’s a funny moment, and we both laughed, with a little embarassement. It made me realize the significance of the experiences we go through. Grief is tricky, and it’s one that people avoid, not knowing how to react or what to say. It’s not an achievenent that you get through and can wear a medal. Though for those who know, you wear an invisble medal. Waters run deep when you have experienced loss, and any loss of any type triggers them all.

What was interesting about that exchange, was that it did not require a heaviness, it was just a recognized connection, that mattered. If that makes sense? The redirection of humor was pleasant, similar to the sunshine after there has been rain. Challenges that everyone faces, deserve any attention, small or large, it all helps. Nothing can be fixed within one moment or with one word, but ignoring will do the opposite.

So, maybe we could be more aware of being “so sorry for your loss”. “So sorry for whatever you are being challenged by!” Our care and connection is what matters and we can guide one another. Not with great words or gestures of distraction, but with presence and respect for our own history.

I believe our souls have more in common than our physicality leads us to believe. That is where our honest conversations will extend from. Not the stories from our brain, where we only want to talk, but the truth and the love and the care. We could reach out from that place, and see what happens next.